A New Year's story about a cursed patio and the perils of poorly-chosen metaphor.
Can we see the new rebuilt patio?
"So I’m not going to waste time pretending not to be some sort of degenerate weirdo."
Whew!
There's the Laurie we all know and love . . . !
Thought we'd lost you to terminal adultingnessosis.
I understand the next stage turns you into this:
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/41/Precursor_to_official_J.R._%22Bob%22_Dobbs_image.jpg/220px-Precursor_to_official_J.R._%22Bob%22_Dobbs_image.jpg
God no. I was just sad.
Good! You're normal!
Aww, this was delightful writing.
Congratulations on your liberation. You have nothing to lose but your patio furniture.
Can we see the new rebuilt patio?
"So I’m not going to waste time pretending not to be some sort of degenerate weirdo."
Whew!
There's the Laurie we all know and love . . . !
Thought we'd lost you to terminal adultingnessosis.
I understand the next stage turns you into this:
https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/4/41/Precursor_to_official_J.R._%22Bob%22_Dobbs_image.jpg/220px-Precursor_to_official_J.R._%22Bob%22_Dobbs_image.jpg
God no. I was just sad.
Good! You're normal!
Aww, this was delightful writing.
Congratulations on your liberation. You have nothing to lose but your patio furniture.